Because Barack Obama is black, it is his solemn duty to weigh in on everything other black people do, especially as it relates to music. You see, Negroes have been making music with naughty lyrics for a while, and since Negroes support Barack Obama, Barack Obama therefore supports everything Negroes do. Kind of like how he helped William Ayers set bombs when he was eight years old - the overarching sense of responsibility that blackness brings actually transcends race. And time. Obama has yet to weigh in on the failure in sanitation that helped cause the Black Plague several hundred years ago, but a statement should be forthcoming.
Of course, John McCain is white. Very white. So white that he can starfuck Latino rapper Daddy Yankee and it doesn’t matter. He doesn’t have to answer for anything, say or do anything more strenuous than, “Here’s Daddy Yankee!” Although it’s fun that the McCain magic transferred over to this event, what with McCain drawing what sounds like about 200-300 people to see this heartthrob, why doesn’t McCain have to answer for this chorus?
I got my heat, I got my balls
and enough heart to break all y’all jaws.
But I rather round up my niggas from Puerto Rico
to help me out with this war
Now bring it on
Now bring it on
Say bring it on
Now bring it on
Daddy Yankee spends much of his time around the same brand of Objectionable Negro that Barack Obama has had to answer for, from Snoop Dogg to Akon to G-Unit, but somehow when he latches on to a Presidential candidate, it’s perfectly fine - he’s even a heartthrob! If only black people could somehow figure out a way to have one black person do something without all black people being responsible for it…I’m sure one day we’ll figure it out, right after Nubian Cold Fusion.
Former Republican speechwriter and CNN talking head Amy Holmes is now an “independent conservative”, despite having been a “Republican consultant” at every point that I can remember up to today.
I’m in full agreement with Ezra—-McCain is going to go with Lieberman as the VP pick. I largely agree with his reasoning—-McCain’s only chance at winning is distinguishing himself from the crazy wingnuts (of which he’s a member of good standing) that have dominated the Bush administration, and for the low information voter, especially, the fact that he picked a former Democrat will show he’s such a moderate guy. To quote Ezra:
More importantly, he amplifies McCain’s most broadly popular qualities, and gives McCain the best chance to muscle into the downscale independents and elderly Democrats who aren’t sold on Obama but mistrust the Republican right. He lets McCain telegraph an ideological ambiguity and shift towards a policy agenda that’s about process, about “reaching across party lines and getting things done,” rather than about sops to the conservative base.
In sum, McCain can only win by hoodwinking the public, as Bush did, and dressing up the crazy wingnut wolf in compassionate/moderate sheep clothing. Lieberman can help.
Of course, the concern for McCain is that a Lieberman pick will alienate the base. I strongly disagree. The first rule of the conservative base is that they are born sheeple, which is why they are conservatives. They’ll vote how their authority figures, from talk show radio hosts to ministers, tell them to vote. Of course, the fear in American elections is always voter apathy—-a lot of people “support” a candidate and don’t bother to vote, especially if they have doubts. So getting the base to the polls is an issue for the McCain campaign. But I suspect they’ll be fired up about the Lieberman pick.
But reports surfaced in the past few days, springing from an Italian Vanity Fair article saying George Obama is living in a shack and “earning less than a dollar a day.”
The reports left him angry.
“I was brought up well. I live well even now,” he said. “The magazines, they have exaggerated everything.
“I think I kind of like it here. There are some challenges, but maybe it is just like where you come from, there are the same challenges,” Obama said.
Obama, who is in his mid-20s, is learning to become a mechanic and is active in youth groups in Huruma. He said he tries to help the community as much as he can.
At least one of his neighbors feels that perhaps the candidate should help the brother.
“I would like Obama to visit his brother to see how he is living, to improve his way of life,” said Emelda Negei, who runs a small dispensary near Obama’s house.
But George Obama will have none of it. He draws inspiration from his famous half-brother. He acknowledges that he is biased but said he knows that his half-brother will be the next president.
The Texas GOP, stepping in with the full force of patronizing assholism (the best kind), attacks Barack Obama for not helping his brother…because John McCain was a POW.
If this election was on the verge of awesome before, it flung itself full-force into awesomeland today, via Dickway Lane.
John McCain’s aides feel as if they’ve been “underusing” the POW card. It figures that the person doing the most to demean and marginalize McCain’s military is McCain himself.
You really have to wonder if McCain spent most of his post-Vietnam, pre-divorce time making himself out to be the Uber Nice Guy. Every time he got turned down by someone who wouldn’t let the fact that he was a POW overshadow the fact that he was cheating, did he wander back home, grousing about how women didn’t want a great POW like him, but instead those asshole pretty boys with the scratches and the medals like John Kerry?
One would think that McCain would take every imaginable step to avoid the trivialization of his time in the military and, in fact, be (somewhat justifiably) oversensitive to it. The Vietnamese tortured the shit out of him for five and a half years, it’s worthy of more respect than telling the server at Olive Garden that even though you only tipped them $3 on a $40 bill, you didn’t tip the guy who brought you mushy rice for 66 months a dime, so they should be happy.
I’m sure you could think of five million other places you’d like to be other than on a boat with the author of the flaming pile of cowcrap The ObamaNation, Jerome Corsi. However, the “Friends of WND” will be sailing away on a seven-day cruise through the Western Caribbean along with a bevy of wingnuts. The theme for the Jan 2009 trip is “America: The Next Four Years.”
So great an impact has “The Obama Nation” already had on America, the establishment has gone into full attack-and-kill mode with Corsi. Typical is the public statement today of Obama spokesman Tommy Vietor, who spewed: “Jerome Corsi is a discredited liar who is pedaling another piece of garbage to continue the Bush-Cheney politics he helped perpetuate four years ago.” The Obama campaign is understandably concerned about the effect of Corsi’s book, especially in light of the disastrous impact “Unfit for Command,” co-authored by Corsi, had on the 2004 presidential campaign of Democrat John Kerry.
On the WND cruise, in addition to being able to hang out with Corsi and talk with him about the state of the world, you’ll also benefit from this Harvard Ph.D.‘s astute economic and financial analysis. In fact, if you sign up during this special offer, you’ll get a FREE one-year subscription to Corsi’s RED ALERT, WND’s new elite weekly economic newsletter on how to understand and thrive during difficult financial times such as America is now facing.
...Right now, Americans face a multitude of challenges – from crushingly high gas prices and a steadily deteriorating economy to unprecedented cultural assaults like same-sex marriage to the constant threat of terrorism to a virtual invasion from Mexico. In the midst of all these battles, this January America will change course by inaugurating a new president. But what will that course be?
McCain people: I’m going to advise your campaign this one time only.
Have John McCain learn how many homes he/his wife/his vault of goblins owns, and stick with that number. Have him learn how many cars he owns, what’s in his bank account, what other assets his family has. Don’t hide behind his wife or Tony Rezko or anyone else. And for God’s sake, don’t let his brother talk at all.
But Joe McCain said, “it’s important to know that, from the time we could talk until the time he’s at the Naval Academy, we were on allowances like everybody else. We lived in rental housing. We never owned a home. We were taking school busses. We were taking the old streetcars (with) tokens. So that’s the life that we grew up in.”
Although none of that actually means that the McCains were growing up middle class, it at least sounds like it, in that Bill O’Reilly “we never ordered appetizers” kind of way.
Then Joe keeps talking:
“The person who took care of all the business was my mother,” he said. “My father had no idea about the family business, what oil leases he owned in Oklahoma.”
Joe McCain, who makes his home in Washington’s Northern Virginia suburbs, chuckled when recalling that “one time, she bought a house to remodel” in Southeast Washington while “he was at sea.”
Joe then guffawed at the time they got bad service at the local Italian restaurant, then his mom bought the place, fired the staff and turned it into a candle shop. You might know it, it’s called “Yankee Candle”? Just a small store. A side business. A side to a side business, really.
It looks like Monopoly Man McCain sat down at the Jesus’ General’s “electrical typing intertubes pamphlet machine” to respond to the charges that he’s out of touch with Americans because he can’t remember how many homes he has.
“McCain” wanted to clear the air to show that he understands the housing crisis that has thousands of people losing (or worrying about losing) their homes.
I’m one of those people. I’ve lost complete track of how many homes I own. I know it’s more than one. People are saying it could be as many as a dozen. I don’t know and, frankly, I don’t care.
All that matters to me is that my driver knows where my homes are and that each of them has a tee vee that gets Matlock. What else does a guy need for Christ’s sake?
Well, I suppose the putting greens are important too, that, and the swimming pools. God knows what we’d do without them. It’s what makes us Americans. Without them, we’d all be Mexicans—hot, sweating, soccer-playing Mexicans who don’t even get Matlock.
Here’s a person-on-the-street interview from the DNC.—asking if folks know how many homes they own.
***
John McCain not only owns more homes than he can count, but he also owns a million dollar parking lot.
In 2006, McCain Owned A Parking Lot Worth Over A Million Dollars. According to McCain’s Senate Personal Finance Disclosure, the McCain family owns a parking lot worth over $1 million. [2007 Executive Branch Personnel Public Financial Disclosure]
The latest campaign kerfuffle is Obama’s effort to make hay out of John McCain’s inability to tell a reporter how many houses he owns. McCain mumbled something about condos and said the reporter should talk to his wife. Predictably, Obama is trying to spin this exchange as showing that McCain is “out of touch.”
I can relate, though. For example, if a reporter asked me how many ties I own, there’s no way I could answer. Just like McCain, I’d tell him he has to ask my wife. Likewise if someone wants to know how many Wii games my kids have.
See, some Americans have a lot of things, like DVDs they got 5 for $20 at Blockbuster, or stamps, or million-dollar houses. It’s all the same! People pick up ties, they pick up condos. It happens, especially at these prices!
The truth is that McCain isn’t out of touch with “ordinary people” because he’s rich, he’s out of touch with his own domestic arrangements because he cares little about material things, and for many years has devoted his extraordinary energies not to enjoying his wife’s money, but to serving the American people. Given the number of nights he’s spent in hotels or on military bases over the last few years, it’s no wonder he hasn’t seen much of his wife’s condos.
Right. John McCain also doesn’t remember his policies because he has the full confidence that he’ll do the right thing no matter what he faces. And he didn’t remember that hamburger he stuck in his winter jacket last April because he actually wanted pizza.
The McCain campaign has released a sequel to Barack Obama: Antichrist Pimp, which, like any good B-movie, is just extra footage from another movie spliced into the first web ad.
Offhand, I had a veepstakes dream last night. Evan Bayh was the choice, then he ended up accidentally killing a guy in a fight the night before he was supposed to be announced. He hid the guy’s body in Obama’s downstairs coat closet, which led to your standard dark comedy hijinks and “guys of different races come together” buddy comedy. There were also some really unnecessary elements of Weekend at Bernie’s tossed in there, with a twist of blackmail thriller from the amateur photographer who got shots of Obama toting around the corpse. Which, oddly enough, was played by a slumming Michael Caine.
A campaign official said that the decision to Go Rezko was Obama’s. “He’s opened the door to this,” the official said.
The ad will be released to network news divisions in time for their broadcasts tonight.
Though McCain is widely perceived to to drawn first blood by attacking Obama’s character, the official said that the difference between Obama’s mocking McCain for his wealth and his shaky answer on the number of homes he owns was that McCain’s charge “reflects an existential reality,” where Obama’s charges “attack Cindy. She owns the homes. I thought he said the wives were off-limits.”
“John McCain got a wife! A wife, motherfucker! And she owns shit! This is crazy! This shit is crazy! TONY REZKO, BITCHES!”
- Dave Chappelle, campaign spokesperson
I enjoy the “existential reality” of Obama hating America vs. the entirely off limits discussion of which of the four to thirteen mansions that McCain’s family owns are really his, as opposed to his wife’s. It’s good to see that the McCain campaign’s response to the first punch he’s caught is to go apeshit nuclear out of the gate. He may go Taxi Driver on us by the time this is said and done.
John McCain’s economic plan was endorsed by two University of Illinois at Chicago economists. William Ayers is also on the faculty at the University of Illinois at Chicago. When will John McCain renounce the support of Wiliam Ayers’ fellow travelers…and how closely connected is he to Ayers’ terrorist acts?
A priest, a rabbi and an imam walk into a bar. John McCain is behind the bar, serving drinks. The rabbi says, “Can I have a Smart Grasshopper?” The imam asks, “What in Allah’s name is a Smart Grasshopper?” The priest is set to answer, when John McCain informs them all that he was a POW and that his penis is currently immersed in a glass of Kahlua. It’s a better White Russian than the Vietcong served.
Jesse already broke the news to all of you pathetic homeowners out there with only one domicile about John McCain’s inability to recall how many houses he owns. The next time you see some GOP swill about Obama being an elitist, think about McCain, who’s so wealthy (or so far into dementia) that he’s made this mind-blowing admission in public to our delight. Here’s the audio—plus the Obama camp’s response.
Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) said in an interview Wednesday that he was uncertain how many houses he and his wife, Cindy, own.
“I think — I’ll have my staff get to you,” McCain told Politico in Las Cruces, N.M. “It’s condominiums where — I’ll have them get to you.”
The correct answer is at least four, located in Arizona, California and Virginia, according to his staff. Newsweek estimated this summer that the couple owns at least seven properties.
The Obama campaign struck back with this ad - fantastic:
His trophy wife Cindy has an estimated worth of more than $100 million to buy all of those pads. I don’t have a problem at all with wealth, be it old or new money—after all, the Kennedys and FDR were from well-to-do families, but were and are committed to social justice and progressive policies. It’s just that McCain has, of late, tried to both portray himself as a regular guy, while he has more residences than he can count (or remember), all while chastising and blaming all the people who are losing their homes in the sub-prime mortgage meltdown; see that below the fold.
If we look at charges of elitism over the past couple of elections, they all tend to come from the sorts of behavior that aren’t particularly novel or elitist except for the fact that they rub some Beltway communal sense of regularness the wrong way. McCain’s major benefit is that he doesn’t actually seem to do anything - he lives in a vacation spot (but one on the continental United States), he’s not a particular threat to climb into a tube or a tank or perform any sort of physical activity more alien than clapping, and he’s not going to propose anything more novel than an O’Reillyesque potential series of thoughts about things that tickle around the edges of breaking with conservative orthodoxy.
He could bathe in rivers of Evian on a platform composed of platinum and rhino bones, and it wouldn’t particularly matter because he likes to look gruff and he’s white and he wants to cut taxes. The fact that he’s entirely removed from virtually all knowledge of his housing situation in the midst of a nationwide housing crisis, however, isn’t room for any concern of elitism because [noun] [verb] [POW].
John McCain is apparently getting too soft and squishy on womb control (yawn, yeah, right) and the fundies and pro-choicers in the party are erupting.
ABC News’ Teddy Davis and Rigel Anderson Report: John McCain’s campaign signaled on Wednesday that the Arizona senator is backing away from his previously stated goal of changing the GOP’s platform on abortion.
...McCain’s decision to leave the platform untouched follows a warning from a prominent social conservative.
“If he were to change the party platform,” to account for exceptions such as rape, incest or risk to the mother’s life, “I think that would be political suicide,” Tony Perkins, the president of the conservative Family Research Council, told ABC News in May. “I think he would be aborting his own campaign because that is such a critical issue to so many Republican voters and the Republican brand is already in trouble.”
...“If he doesn’t change the platform, then he’s being the same kind of hypocrite that he accused Bush of being in 2000,” Jennifer Blei Stockman, the co-chairwoman of Republican Majority for Choice, told ABC News in May.
If McCain picks a pro-choice VP, watch out; Dobson et. al. will explode. Or at least I would expect the hypocrite of Colorado Springs to do so; after all, he’s already had to eat crow for coming around for the Arizona senator after swearing he’d stay home rather than vote for him. In fact, in 2000, he said this about McCain:
“The Senator,” Dobson said, “is being touted by the media as a man of principle, yet he was involved with other women while married to his first wife, and was implicated in the so-called Keating scandal with four other senators. He was eventually reprimanded by the Congress for the ‘appearance of impropriety.’ The Senator reportedly has a violent temper and can be extremely confrontational and profane when angry. These red flags about Senator McCain’s character are reminiscent of the man who now occupies the White House.”
Gee Daddy D, how has it all changed for you these days?
Speaking of drop-kicks and pressure on McCain from the fundies as he hones in on his Veep pick, conservative Richard A. Viguerie, chairman of ConservativeHQ.com (always good for a press release to beat on who he thinks is too soft to be a true conservative), wrote a hilarious open letter to the presumptive GOP nominee—it’s below the fold.
Because Barack Obama is black, it is his solemn duty to weigh in on everything other black people do, especially as it relates to music. You see, Negroes have been making music with naughty lyrics for a while, and since Negroes support Barack Obama, Barack Obama therefore supports everything Negroes do. Kind of like how he helped William Ayers set bombs when he was eight years old - the overarching sense of responsibility that blackness brings actually transcends race. And time. Obama has yet to weigh in on the failure in sanitation that helped cause the Black Plague several hundred years ago, but a statement should be forthcoming. 
I’m in full agreement with Ezra—-
John McCain’s aides feel as if they’ve been 
McCain people: I’m going to advise your campaign this one time only.
Go 
