“As Right Wing Watch points out, this completely destroys the entire point of the birther movement.”

I’m sure there’s some super-secret and crazy-complicated reason it doesn’t.  Like Madelyn Dunham was actually a Nazi agent dispatched to Hawaii during the death throes of the Third Reich in order to procreate with non-Aryans until she bore a child (in international waters) that she thought could destroy the US government in 50 years, which she was then to pass off as her daughter’s…uh…because.  She had shit to do at that point, I guess?

Wait, is he suggesting that Madelyn Dunham had an affair with Obama Sr.?

Yeah, I’m not entirely sure who the father’s supposed to be here.  I’m assuming Sidney Poitier.

“Players?” Barack Obama was given birth to by “players,” not parents? Doesn’t this take paranoiac conspiracy theories to the next level? Like a counterpoint to a virgin birth, his origins are inherently wicked?

“Players?” Barack Obama was given birth to by “players,” not parents?

He’s a series of clones created in a lab!  He is he is he is!!  Only he isn’t Kenyan.  He’s Japanese, created by the government to bring about the Third Impact and Instrumentality ZOMG. </anime dorkness>

“Like a counterpoint to a virgin birth, his origins are inherently wicked?”

...that was never in doubt.  He is, after all, the product of miscegenation.  By definition his origins are inherently wicked, as my sainted (and bigoted) grandfather would have been happy to point out.

My grandfather would often say “Birds of a feather flock together”, meaning that the races should always remain separate.  And besides, Obama Sr., as a son of Ham, was himself born cursed by the sins of Ham. 

It’s all right there in The Inerrant Bible, just as Jesus said, in English, to King James…

Thank you for this invaluable Farah update.

I realize that these people already had William of Occam spinning in his grave, but…WHAT THE HELL?

What the fuck?

Except, um, that Barack Obama is the spitting image of his grandfather Stanley Dunham:

http://www.hotklix.com/link/news/world/Barack-Obama-s-grandfather-looks-like-a-white-Barack-Obama

So…according to the latest wacko conspiracy theory: Madelyn Dunham would somehow have been impregnanted by BOTH her husband and Barack Obama, Sr, the same egg, two different sperm, and Barack Obama is his own fraternal twin, born in Kenya?

My head hurts.

Really, the only way Farah can outdo himself now is to involve extra-terrestrial aliens, preferably with the claim that they’re here illegally, stealing our jobs and not paying taxes.

I know you’re on a crusade, norbizness, to police who and what every blogger should deign to respond to, but maybe you haven’t noticed that the word goes directly from fringe whackjobs like Farah, who no one’s ever heard of outside blogging insider circles, and permeates directly into the public consciousness, leading to spectacles like those going on inside townhalls right now. This idea WILL catch on within a certain subset of the American population, and it WILL lead to more noise and bullshit, and countering it with half a fucking paragraph doesn’t seem like an overzealous investment.

Is there some sort of matrix of notability we should be referring to when deciding whether to write a blog post? Some sort of “You must no more fringe than X to be worth discussing/ridiculing” affair? Crosstalk is heard on 80 stations, three of them in my state, and I’m glad to know what some of my fellow Oregonians are believing.

I can find no evidence that would lead me to conclude that Muammar al-Gaddafi is not the father-player.

Farah isn’t just “fringe”, either. He’s a primo wingnut welfare whore. And the Sadly, No! rationale applies to the Z-list wingnuts who get hosted on WingNut Daily and elsewhere—they speak the id of the base, without the qualifications and sanitisation of the D-list operatives.

Y’know, why not just say that he was the son of Idi Amin and a space alien? Go hog fucking wild. The reason people considered the Trip Palin story plausible is that quite a few kids have been raised believing their grandma was their mother and that their mother was their big sister.

Having a grandma who’s actually your mother? Not so much.

I just called up my mother and thanked her for being such a player in my birth.

I look forward fondly to the day that these people are viewed by the general public with the same attitude with which they mock Area 51 fanatics, Bigfoot sighters, and Chariots of the Gods fans.

How many parents does that make for President Obama, now?  I still can’t get over the Malcolm X allegation.

judybrowni,
I was going to point out how much he looks like his grandfather too. But I think that will only make the birthers think that gramps had an affair with Rosa Parks and Obama is their love child. Only he was born when Rosa was living in Botswana.

“Really, the only way Farah can outdo himself now is to involve extra-terrestrial aliens, preferably with the claim that they’re here illegally, stealing our jobs and not paying taxes.”

Nope, someone else beat him to it (h/t Sadly, No):

http://educate-yourself.org/cn/baracksoetorofamilyphoto16sep08.shtml

How long until they claim Jimi Hendrix was the father?

Look, Obama was cloned from the DNA taken from the world’s worst socialists: Hitler, Stalin, Mao and Eugene Debs. isn’t it obvious?

I look forward fondly to the day that these people are viewed by the general public with the same attitude with which they mock Area 51 fanatics, Bigfoot sighters, and Chariots of the Gods fans.

Sweet Jesus, do we have to wait 30 years? Also, not to burst your bubble, but there are plenty of people who still take all those things seriously.

Look, Obama was cloned from the DNA taken from the world’s worst socialists: Hitler, Stalin, Mao and Eugene Debs. isn’t it obvious?

The according to C-Street’s The Family, he would be the perfect Chosen of the Lord to lead us all into the perfect Christian Capitalism. So it can’t be that.

Wait, have we abandoned Pam Atlas’s “Obama is the love child of Malcolm X” theory?

…what?

This gave me a headache just reading it.  The instant I got to “honestly I don’t think we know with any certainty whatsoever who those players are in Barack Obama’s life” I needed some Advil.

Yeah, I’m not entirely sure who the father’s supposed to be here.  I’m assuming Sidney Poitier.

I thought it was fairly well established that Obama was actually the illegitimate son of Malcom X.  So clearly Malcolm X had some kind of affair with Obama’s “maternal” grandmother and he was the result.

The fact that Obama looks so much like his “maternal” grandfather is clearly evidence of a dastardly scheme that goes all the way back to his childhood!  They found a man to pose as his grandfather who looked like they predicted Obama would look when he was an adult!  Nefarious!

honestly I don’t think we know with any certainty whatsoever who those players are in Barack Obama’s life

Joseph Farah, player-hater.

When are they just going to accept that President Obama is all the result of God’s Plan?

I look almost exactly like my maternal great-grandmother with the exception of the ears. Clearly, she came back from the grave so that she could conceive and birth me.

(By the way, how many of you know how unkind time will be to you? *raises hand*)

@Jesse Taylor

Does that make Will Smith the First Sibling?

You know, we could present evidence that Obama was immacuately conceived by the Holy Spirit itself, and these suckers would scream about him being Jewish…

@catgirl

But, but, Obama himself has already SAID he was sent to earth by his father, Jor-El!
So of COURSE he’s an alien.

created by the government to bring about the Third Impact and Instrumentality ZOMG.

And it’s all going to end with Glenn Beck strangling Michelle Malkin, only everyone will have wandered away out of disinterest before that point to go see what’s for sale in the dealer’s room.

(I totally buy Glenn as a whiny ineffectual adolescent with daddy issues, just don’t ask me to picture him in a plug suit.)

Except, um, that Barack Obama is the spitting image of his grandfather Stanley Dunham,

I’m going to tell you a belief that some people have that’s so crazy that it will make you spit out your drink, so swallow now:

Some people are convinced that, every time a woman has sex with a man, she stores up some of his characteristics, which means that you could have babies that look like a guy you slept with 5 years ago instead of your current partner.  I have never been able to figure out how this is supposed to work since it goes against everything we know about genetics, but it actually pre-dates our knowledge of genetics, so what was once a “scientific fact” has turned into a folk belief.

It’s not uncommon among people who breed animals (dogs, horses, etc.) so they tell you that you have to be super-careful who you breed with your female since she could have puppies/foals with that male’s bad characteristics years down the road even if she’s bred to a different one.

So, yes, for these people, it’s entirely possible that Madelyn Dunham could get pregnant by Barack Obama Sr. and have a baby that looks like her husband.

I hope no one causes themselves a permanent injury laughing at this, but I swear to God it’s a belief that’s still out there.

I am relieved to say that I don’t know any cat breeders stupid enough to buy that one.

“I hope no one causes themselves a permanent injury laughing at this, but I swear to God it’s a belief that’s still out there.”

Back in the day it wasn’t “characteristics”—it was straight up sperm.  Well, “seed,” but you know.  The idea is that sperm can knock around in a female’s reproductive tract for years* rather than days, so you could marry a widow of five years and the child she bears a year into the marriage might actually be her dead first husband’s.  I’m sure there’s some bizarre ambulatory-uterus theory that accounts for why celibate women don’t conceive from stored sperm.

*True in some species, none of which are human or domesticated mammals.

I love that picture of Barack Obama as a white man—John Edwards’ hair and Hillary’s eyes!

I think Mnemosyne is on to something.

The fact that Obama looks so much like his “maternal” grandfather is clearly evidence of a dastardly scheme that goes all the way back to his childhood!  They found a man to pose as his grandfather who looked like they predicted Obama would look when he was an adult!  Nefarious!

To be fair, that would have been quite easy for these “players” to do, after having so much practice with predicting that Obama would be the first black president, yet choosing for him to be born in Kenya (to whichever mother) and hoaxing the whole thing with a birth certificate and birth announcements in two local newspapers.  They are masters at predicting the future and making up hoaxes, which is why extra-terrestrials must be involved.

Speaking of encounters with the crazypants community, I just confirmed that I’m going to a health care town hall tonight. Anyone been and have advice?

The best defense is a good offense.  Get there early so can you can get a seat in the front.  Bring up your questions as soon as you can, before the wingnuts get a chance.  I have this dream of going and yelling about all the evils the wingnuts cry about, but doing it as a complaint about our current system.  For example, I would bitch about this terrible “rationing” and how it’s already happening and must stop.  I’d complain loudly about insurance company “death panels”, etc.  I’d beat them at their own game.

“Anyone been and have advice?”

If you have to pepper-spray anyone, for the love of god don’t rub your eyes afterwards.

Look, Obama was cloned from the DNA taken from the world’s worst socialists: Hitler, Stalin, Mao and Eugene Debs. isn’t it obvious?

He’s Serpentor?

Speaking of encounters with the crazypants community, I just confirmed that I’m going to a health care town hall tonight. Anyone been and have advice?

Take a camera, preferably a video camera, and make sure you film the assholes.  Get at least one good shot of each of their faces and clothing before the party gets started, so they can be identified from bad footage later.  Then, keep an eye on them and be willing to start filming if anything goes down.

Godless Heathen @34:  But does Congress get turned into Tang first?  Or is it the media?  I’ve never been able to bring myself to watch EoE while ON my meds…

Caren—I thought White Obama looked like Dennis Kucinich. 

In addition to the very good idea of filming faces if you do get to talk come armed with an anecdote and I like the idea of co-opting the right’s buzzwords like “death panels.”  Like the insurance companies that refused to insure my partner’s mother because she had had recurring breast cancer.  And make the case for why health care reform is needed *now*.

And if people complain about government-run health care ask them to give up their (or their parents’) right to Medicare.

Being the science fiction fan of a certain age that I am, I’m waiting for someone to try to tie Obama to a Masonic/Illuminati conspiracy.  I have no idea what shape it would take or why, I never got into Illuminati stuff but I remember how hot it was in the 1970s.  Therefore, I’m waiting for that end of the nut spectrum to resurface.

“I know you’re on a crusade, norbizness, to police who and what every blogger should deign to respond to, but maybe you haven’t noticed that the word goes directly from fringe whackjobs like Farah, who no one’s ever heard of outside blogging insider circles, and permeates directly into the public consciousness, leading to spectacles like those going on inside townhalls right now. This idea WILL catch on within a certain subset of the American population, and it WILL lead to more noise and bullshit, and countering it with half a fucking paragraph doesn’t seem like an overzealous investment.”

Well, it bubbles out, but the people who believe are crazies who hate liberals. And they are going to be crazies who hate liberals no matter what the actual content they give to their hate.

“Back in the day it wasn’t “characteristics”—it was straight up sperm.  Well, “seed,” but you know.  The idea is that sperm can knock around in a female’s reproductive tract for years* rather than days, so you could marry a widow of five years and the child she bears a year into the marriage might actually be her dead first husband’s.  I’m sure there’s some bizarre ambulatory-uterus theory that accounts for why celibate women don’t conceive from stored sperm.”

I’d like to think it was first invented by a quick-thinking widow to explain to the local morality police why she was knocked up so long after her husband’s death.

Re: Storing “seed”

I’d like to think it was first invented by a quick-thinking widow to explain to the local morality police why she was knocked up so long after her husband’s death.

Wouldn’t we all?

But it’s more likely it was invented by the morality police themselves to justify killing someone’s “slutty” daughter for making herself unmarriageable. Who’d pay a dowry on a bride that dispenses counterfeit heirs?