Their blurb is true, for those cases where “never” equals “always”.

It is “hot” because it has a guaranteed audience of wingnuts, who would buy Coulter’s used maxipads if she flattened them and stapled them between two covers.

Oh, please.  It’s about how Obama is a godless Islamicist Marxist Weatherman who slavers at the prospect of maximizing the number of abortions in America so some can be botched and the newborns can then be killed.  What the hell else would Annie One-Note be writing now?

MikeEss, plagarism *is* theft.

Well, you have to understand that Coulter’s muse is simply not like other writer’s muse. Whereas other nonfiction writers might spend hours at the library, or reviewing their notes or newpaper clippings, or online searching Lexus-Nexis, Coulter’s creative process is decidedly different, and does not yield product in a linear fashion. From the notes of famous Coulterologists (sadly, none have survived to give a first hand report) I have been able to piece together the general cycle of a Coulter book creation:

After devouring a small puppy whole, Coulter will regurgitate an “Ann pellet” of the puppy’s bones and fur which she will then burn in a brazier and inhale the fumes. This will provide her with a general working title. From there, she will recede into her nest for several days, where she will slough off her outer skin, while sending out her mating call, a rapid-fire series of dogwhistles like “Islamofascist,” and “Islamofacimarxist.” She will appear from this molting glistening and seek a young, naive male, which she will lure into her lair—her pheromones are actually being studied by the DoD for their biological warfare capabilities as we speak—but having secured the unsuspecting male, she will begin the process of crafting the book. This is where most of the accounts of the Coulterologists are terminated, however, it appears that the act may be similar to the scene leading up to the final fight in the season one ep of Buffy Teacher’s Pet.

The publishers, wisely, do not attempt to pry into any of this process, knowing that the survival rate of spectators is zero. So they can only announce when she has visited the local Humane Society and purchased a small puppy, knowing that a new book will soon be forthcoming.

Legal is trying to figure out if Random House will get in trouble with the Secret Service for publishing a book in which the author repeatedly and explicitly advocates killing the president.

It’ll be available for FREE on all the wingnut websites within a week of publication as literally tens of copies trickle off the shelves of Berean Bookstores everywhere.

MikeEss—not to mention the ungodly screeching.

I think it’s called “100 Foot Neon Outrage: How This Liberal Person/Group/Institution/Idea Destroyed This Conservative Person/Group/Institution/Idea…....and What You Can Do To Stop It”

They’ll get a better handle on the book as soon as she mad libs in the correct oppressor and besieged conservative.

http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/

Alternate, slightly shorter, publisher:

Nope, none of us could read it either.

MikeEss—it’s a lovely thought, but I’d be afraid it would be worse than building on an ancient Indian burial ground. Wouldn’t want to inflict that on people who’ve already suffered enough.

I’ve got a few suggestions, if Ann hasn’t thought of one.
“Meal Ticket”
“My Invitation to Hardball some time in January”
“Buzzwords: The Liberal Conspiracy to Destroy Conservative Intellectual Prowess”
“Nail’n Palin:  Not a direct ripe-off of a politically incorrect porno”
“Please!  Please!  Look At Me!  I’m Lonely!”
“New York Times Best Seller List Sucks!  Haha!  You Have To Print This.”

I’ve wondered what happened to Coulter. She sort of disappeared the last year or so. My theory was she’s really a “harvest being” like those in The Island, hence Phyllis Schafly’s continued existence.

God!  If you’ve never had to deal with a stubborn nest of Coulters in your attic, you’re lucky.  The mess, and the smell!…

The problem is that the Coulter eats her own numerous young.  Just as you get rid of one, another dozen rise to take her place, smaller but almost as annoying.

There’s never a Cadmann Weyland around when you need one.

The thing about Coulter (aside from fucking her in the ass, hard) that always weirded me out is her, ah, fanbase. Back, like, 2003/4ish, they were backing her to the hilt, arguing her points and footnotes. Y’know, really trying to prove her right. Then, I think around 05 or so, nothing much changed on her part, but suddenly, Coulter was ALWAYS just stirring the pot. She was ALWAYS just doing satire, and us widdle Dems/Liberals needed to get a sense of humor, sheesh. It was weird. I was even able to quote people (thank you, internet) on it, and they would just shuffle their feet, and insist they were joking or trying to prove a point to teh liburals.

It was so weird. She really didn’t up the level of insanity (which would have impressed me, given the baseline level of batshittery), but, as one, they decided she was now joking, and had always been joking, and we couldn’t see it because we were the targets. We’ve always been at war with Eurasia, y’know?

After Christmas:

“Please, God, don’t let anyone but the right-wing buying clubs read or review this book.”

Yeah, B, real nice w/the sexual assault ‘joke’.  What are you, AC’s apprentice?

Er, I was making reference to this:

http://ifuckedanncoulterintheasshard.blogspot.com/

I’ve loved Ann Coulter ever since she was photographed for the cover of that Edgar Winter album, “They Only Come Out at Night”.  Gawd, she is beautiful!!!

I’ve loved Ann Coulter ever since she was photographed for the cover of that Edgar Winter album, “They Only Come Out at Night”.  Gawd, she is beautiful!!!

Oh my GOD he’s right! If my husband wore makeup… he would look like Ann Coulter!

I may never have sex again.

(Disclaimer: My husband looks exactly like Edgar Winter. Well, like Edgar Winter *did*, given that my husband is about 20-30 years younger than Winter.)

It is “hot” because it has a guaranteed audience of wingnuts, who would buy Coulter’s used maxipads if she flattened them and stapled them between two covers.

I think they’ve already had success with that method.

In other words, whatever it is, she owns it!

Mostly I feel sorry for the trees that lost their lives to create what is most certain to be a book filled with pointless vitriol.