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Next entry: Unintended consequences Previous entry: Freepers taking up arms, predicting race riots if Obama loses

Mavericking The Maverick

imageWith Fox News and Karl Rove both going after John McCain for lying about everything that crosses his mind, there’s a nice bit of irony at work here.  Republicans and Republican organs are actually gaining independence from the Republican Party’s sleazy methods by attacking the maverick whose entire appeal is talking about how much he distanced himself from the Republican Party’s sleazy methods.  The Maverick has become the path to Maverickdom, and Republicans can now safely attack him to divorce themselves from what the GOP is churning out.

It’s like ten thousand spoons when all you need is to stop lying about every fucking thing on earth, like the fact there are only 2,298 spoons and an extra 300 sporks.  Asshole.

Mickey Kaus, of course, gives a plethora of reasons why attacking John McCain as a liar is a horrible idea.  To clarify things, there’s only one reason: John McCain isn’t a Democrat.

a) MSM outrage doesn’t sway voters anymore. It didn’t even back in 1988, when the press tried to make a stink about George H.W. Bush’s use of “flag factories,” etc. After this year’s failed MSM Palin assault, it certainly won’t work;

Yep, the media’s incredibly bad at pushing attacks into the mainstream.  Sarah Palin is also a policy wonk and the handlebar mustache is making a comeback in the annals of facial hair lore.

b) When Dems get outraged at unfairness they look weak. How can they stand up to Putin if they start whining when confronted with Steve Schmidt? McCain’s camp can fake umbrage all it wants—the latest is that an Atlantic photographer took some nasty photos that the mag didn’t run!—and nobody will accuse MCain of being weak. That’s so unfair. A double standard. Dems can learn to live with it or complain about the unfairness for another 4 years. Their choice.

In other words, Democrats are whiny and everyone knows it, and Republicans are whiny too, but that’s okay, because if Democrats point out they’re being whiny, that makes them doubleplus whiny which, ergo, means that Democrats are whiny, which was made obvious by the quadruple whining they did the whole time.  This one had no point, but don’t whine about it.

c) It’s almost always impossible to prove that a Republican attack is a 100% lie. Either there’s a germ of truth (Kerry did hype his wartime heroism at least a bit) or the truth is indeterminate (i.e., there’s no way of knowing what Obama meant by “lipstick”—just because he and McCain used the word earlier doesn’t mean he didn’t think using it now, after Palin’s speech, didn’t add a witty resonance).

You know, it’s really hard to prove that “there was no Holocaust” is a lie, because there was, in fact, a Holocaust.

d) Lecturing the public on what’s ‘true” and what’s a “lie” (when the truth isn’t 100% clear) plays into some of the worst stereotypes about liberals—that they are preachy know-it-alls hiding their political motives behind a veneer of objectivity and respectability.

You know, by this standard, the way that a liberal wins an election is by simply wandering around outside, saying nothing and looking expectantly at people and hoping they get it, but not judging them if they don’t.  It’s the sad puppy method of electioneering.

e) Inevitably the people being outraged on Obama’s behalf will phrase their arguments in ways well-designed to appeal to their friends—and turn off the unconverted. (‘This is just what they did to John Kerry and Michael Dukakis!’ As if the public yearns for the lost Kerry and Dukakis Presidencies. ‘Today’s kindergarteners need some sex education. Just because Republicans are old fashioned ...’ etc. Or ‘These are Karl Rove tactics,’ which signifies little to non-Dem voters except a partisan rancor they’d like to put behind them.)

Lots of people like bad Disney movies, and don’t like the kind of people who sneer at bad Disney movies.

...Right. 

So, to sum up, what Democrats need to do in order to effectively sell an anti-Republican message that resonates with the American people is to:

  • Not get their message covered by the media
  • Not be angry or forceful
  • Not deny anything that Republicans say, because it’s too difficult to prove one way or the other
  • Not actually make the case that anything is actually good or bad or true or false, because people don’t like hearing that
  • Not refer to anything in a way that will appeal to Democrats

Which, in turn, leaves us with the option of a Democratic presidential candidate shoving a screwdriver in his ear when he even thinks about speaking.  It polls well.

 

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Posted by Jesse Taylor on 08:10 PM • (21) Comments

So why doesn’t Mr. GoatBlower just cut the crap and flat out tell the Democratic Party to disband so we can all embrace <strike>National Socialism</strike>, sorry, Republicanism and become what America was destined to be:  A Single Party Fascist Dictatorship…

Comment #1: MikeEss  on  09/15  at  08:43 PM

After this year’s failed MSM Palin assault, it certainly won’t work.

Wait—there was a failed MSM Palin assault?  I must’ve missed that.  All I saw was the MSM Palin lovefest.

Comment #2: pen brynisa  on  09/15  at  08:53 PM

“In other words, Democrats are whiny and everyone knows it, and Republicans are whiny too, but that’s okay, because if Democrats point out they’re being whiny, that makes them doubleplus whiny which, ergo, means that Democrats are whiny, which was made obvious by the quadruple whining they did the whole time. “

That’s awesome.

Comment #3: Lisa KS  on  09/15  at  09:06 PM

Oh, quit whining wink

Comment #4: Indy  on  09/15  at  09:14 PM

Republicans don’t whine. They fulminate in manly outrage. Unless they’re female republicans, in which case they chastise in a tone that Must Be Obeyed.

Comment #5: paul  on  09/15  at  09:40 PM

...

Aren’t conservatives the ones who mock liberals for all their relativism and postmodern whatnot and “well, we can never really know for sure what the truth is, or what Truth is”?  I mean, come on, now.

Comment #6: smadin  on  09/15  at  09:51 PM

I heard that John McCain wants to remain in Iraq for no less than 100 years and that he truly believes that one is rich only at incomes above five million dollars per annum.  This is true, I assume?

Comment #7: Horace Rumpole  on  09/15  at  10:04 PM

Kerry did hype his wartime heroism at least a bit

No, he didn’t. 

Not to mention his postwar heroism, but that’s always been the real problem for these people . . .

Comment #8: rea  on  09/15  at  10:34 PM

When I take over, Mickey Kaus goes up against a wall right after David Brooks and right before Lou Dobbs.

Comment #9: felagund  on  09/15  at  10:51 PM

There really isn’t a way to describe the irony of an article about how democrats should, or could, or can’t, or do—but fail to—defend against lying using a large number of previously debunked lies.

Comment #10: Eric  on  09/15  at  10:58 PM

Excuse me, but wouldn’t you say Carly Fiorina was whining about the SNL sketch? I sure would.

Comment #11: hamletta  on  09/15  at  11:10 PM

The McCain camp has some sort of whine constantly going on that sometimes almost seems to recede into the other self-similar background noise of the political landscape.  When they weren’t bitching about the media’s treatment of Palin, they were crying about the media’s treatment of McCain.  They whine about how popular Obama is compared to their candidate.

They are probably the whiniest, most petty complaining campaign ever run.  It’s no surprise to me, then, that they would attack the other guy for being whiny, as it shifts focus off of them, and is also consistent with their record of whining.

Comment #12: Eric  on  09/15  at  11:16 PM

The biggest tell in that bit, to my mind, was him having the straw liberals say, “This is just what they did to Dukakis and Kerry!”  I’ve heard people say something similar, but it’s not Dukakis.  It’s Gore.

Because, of course, people *are* yearning for a Gore presidency.  Kaus knows it.

Comment #13: Ferox  on  09/15  at  11:19 PM

When I take over, Mickey Kaus goes up against a wall right after David Brooks and right before Lou Dobbs.

Well, heck, why not put them up against the wall together, so they might share one last passionate embrace as their true selves.

Comment #14: Ms Kate  on  09/15  at  11:21 PM

If Kaus is gone, who’ll blow all those goats?  Won’t someone think about the goats!?!...

Comment #15: MikeEss  on  09/15  at  11:45 PM

Who’s the blower of the goats who wants us all to see
M I C ... K E Y .. K A U S whee!

Comment #16: Ms Kate  on  09/15  at  11:55 PM

They are probably the whiniest, most petty complaining campaign ever run.

I remember back about a year ago, when nobody thought McCain had a chance in hell of making it past Iowa, let alone this far, he whined about how his handlers were dressing him in sweaters that looked “gay”, and this was to blame for his poor numbers and complete lack of fundraising.

Comment #17: The Opoponax  on  09/16  at  12:13 AM

Isn’t “mavericking the maverick” an obscure term for the latest supposedly obscene multiple bent finger gesture guaranteed to get small minded high school principals to delay the yearbook distribution?

Comment #18: Ms Kate  on  09/16  at  12:17 AM

Lots of people like bad Disney movies, but only a complete fucking moron Republican tool names himself after a Disney character.

Comment #19: Roger Ailes  on  09/16  at  02:58 AM

You know, if the ticket was Brett/Bart, I might be tempted to vote for the Maverick. Although they’d rip off the country as bad as the Republicans, they’d end up feeling bad and putting it into health care and food for poor kids. Or getting it all stolen back from them. Whatever happened, it would be stylish and harmless in the end.

And cousin Beauregard would become a diplomat?
</TV geek>

Comment #20: Samantha Vimes  on  09/16  at  06:54 AM

Am I the only one that is about ready for an elitist know-it-all to take over control of the government? The past 8 years of down-home know-nothings didn’t seem to work out so well.

Like we used to say in second-grade, better a smart-ass than a dumb-shit.

Comment #21: Chet  on  09/16  at  11:59 AM
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