“what you’ve just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.”

(hat tip to an appropriately idiotic movie, Billy Madison)

I like the “Why are Marxist discriminating against females?”

Say what?

Hence the fact that the vast majority of us prefer to call it “marriage equality” or simply “marriage” - “gay marriage” is pretty much a media construct.

Luckily this person’s post isn’t a drinking game where we take a shot whenever they get something staggeringly wrong - we’d never be able to stand up.

“how does gay prove they’re gay when they get a gay marriage license”
a) we don’t have to - hence the “party A” and “party B” thingie, and
b) umm, by showing up with Party B who happens to be the same gender?

Please tell me that “syn” is not an active member of the gene pool.

Oh yuck. Now I have stupid all over me.

ouch. that HURTS

my brain is on fire

Wow. That is some epic, epic fail.

The inside of that guy’s mind must have Killer Klowns from Outer Space playing on a 24/7 loop.

WTF?

That’s just so incoherent, it’s hard to even call it stupid.  It’s either indicative of some advanced form or syphilic dementia, or he just finished smoking a bowl of crack.

Thanks.  Now my brain is going to hurt for the rest of the day.

I’m sure you’ve all heard the little aphorism about how if you locked 500 monkeys in a room with typewriters, they would eventually produce the complete works of Shakespeare.

This is one of the many, many rejects from that project.

....Please tell me this person hasn’t been allowed to breed.

Just like - the Model T Ford came in any color you wanted, just as long as the color you wanted was “black.”

When Ford said it, it was a joke. These jokers think it’s an actual argument.

And it’s technically not even true. Gay people don’t have the right to marry persons of the opposite sex, since having one of the participants be homosexual is, in the eyes of the law, grounds for annulment. Annulment by a third party, even. The government won’t recognize the legitimacy of a straight marriage if one of the participants isn’t actually straight.

At least that’s one way to look at it.

Do gays care at all about homosexuals?

Oh, that line so needs to be made into a meme, RIGHT NOW. I can just see conservatives caught in same-sex relationships turning this into an argument: “I’m not one of those fruity-pants gays, I’m a homosexual—like Socrates! They’re using me for their gay agenda, but gays do not care about homosexuals at all!!!”

“my homosexual friends who don’t like gay”

Huh what?  Last time I checked the gay handbook—pardon me Mr. Stupidpants, the homosexual handbook—it was rather more likely to be the other way around.

Sadly, the rest of the comments on that page aren’t any better.

arRRGH!
the stupid burns!

and I’m sure this guy has “homosexual friends”.  Uh huh.  right.

>>my homosexual friends who don’t like gay

>WTF? What is this guy smoking? This is feeble beyond belief.

Seen this line of argument before.

There’s a contingent of homosexual misogynists on the right-wing who propose the idea that ‘gay culture’ is basically an attempt by feminists to appropriate what they call ‘men lovers’ to their cause. That it is an attempt at feminizing society, and that effeminate homosexuals need to be forced back in the fucking closet so that society will stop lumping in ‘manly men who love men’ with these ‘degenerates’.

Gag.

This all makes me think of Kinbote, the protagonist of Nabokov’s Pale Fire (who is ten times more irritatating than Humbert Humbert, IMO). He’s gay but his preferred euphemism for gay male sex is “manly customs.”

In any case, just how many “homosexual friends” does this guy have?

Props to Opoponax, whose post made me laugh so hard I choked a little.

Random: Why do people say “Lastly, ” when they have several more things they want to say?

Do gays care at all about homosexuals?

No, there’s an element of truth to this, although I don’t think those guys own up to “homosexual” any more than “gay.”

There are definitely Larry Craig-like individuals who prefer life in the closest for themselves, and for everyone else.  After all, what happens to guys who like anonymous, illegal restroom sex to spice up their conformist lives when gays everywhere are becoming open, legal and normal?  When all the hot young things no longer need anonymous restroom sex becasue they can openly have a relationship with another person of the same sex?  The Larry Craigs won’t admit they’re gay, and find themselves husbands, because that’s not what they’re looking for sexually—what they want is to do it in airport restrooms, with the risk of arrest for spice.

It’s tragic, in a way—but not so tragic that I’m willing to give up my rights so the Larry Craigs of the world can have the sex life they prefer.

I lost brain cells trying to process this.  I’m getting old and can’t spare that many.

Thanks loads.

I swear to God, sometimes I think that some of these people have a Fractured Theory Magic Eight Ball that they look into before they start to type.  It’s the only explanation for some of the stuff that shows up on their sites.

Just…. wow…

I went over there and made a calm civil rebuttal to the ideas they were presenting I was called a lying socialist who sought to destroy america.  Then, when I protested the vitriolic attitude of the commenters, I was told by a site administrator that his site has “the most erudite commenters around”.  That website is filled with hateful, emotional, and infantile people.  It’s places like that which shake my faith in humanity.

I like the idea that there’s a separate “gay marriage license” and you have to prove you’re gay to get it.  Like Gavin Newsom won’t give you a license until you make out with him.  (That’s if you’re a guy, of course.  Women can’t even get gay-married!)

What is his obsession with my public school gym teacher, Gay Smith? Why don’t any of this guy’s friends like Gay? He was a perfectly nice man. And to prove he was Gay, all he had to do was show his birth certificate.

Do gays care at all about homosexuals?

More importantly: is our children learning?

This post actually reminds me a lot of our Fearless Leader’s syntax and logic. Sort of scattered, free-associative stoner-talk, all premised on concern-troll smugness.

Perhaps Bush spends his time commenting on political blogs.

The fail molecules are composed of fail atoms, which are composed of failons.

I am all for universal marriage rights and I want to reassure those to whom it matters that there will still be plenty of people who like to hook up in public restrooms.

I like the idea that there’s a separate “gay marriage license” and you have to prove you’re gay to get it.

It’s kind of like to be a saint you have to prove X number of miracles; to prove you’re gay you have to show X amount of gay.  Kind of like when my friend and his wife needed to show that they weren’t just getting married so he could get his citizenship.  “Prove you have an actual relationship” they said.  “OK,” he said, “here’s a rubber stamp with both of our names in a heart and a picture of us hugging each other on vacation.”  “Check and check.”

Of course, if you want to prove like, you know, gay homosexual gay gayosity, you’ll have to up the ante a bit.  “Prove you’re actually gay.”  “OK, Here’s a rubber stamp with both our names in a heart and a picture of us having the raunchiest anal sex ever.”  “God damn, I can’t wait for that promotion to open up so I never have to look at another one of those.  Here you go, Next!”

It’s kind of like to be a saint you have to prove X number of miracles; to prove you’re gay you have to show X amount of gay.

Sometimes they waive the fourth miracle.  They just waived it!

If only gays would get over their rainbow and give my friends their lives back. That rainbow has stolen so many young, promising lives! It is the scourge of our nation.

Lastly, how does gay prove they’re gay when they get a gay marriage license?

The same way as straight people do—by banging someone of the appropriate gender at the appropriate window at the county courthouse (Window 7B—estimated quarterly unincorporated franchise tax filings, sexual orientation demonstrations, and elevator inspections).  Geez.

More seriously, “the same way as straight people do.”  After all, isn’t this guy’s supposed point that gay people are already allowed to marry members of the opposite sex?

The same way as straight people do—by banging someone of the appropriate gender at the appropriate window at the county courthouse

Which is the longest part of the process really.

<british accent>

The Marxists don’t enter into it!

</british accent>

Seriously, though, they don’t.  I’m very confused about that part.

Can I make out with Gavin Newsom?

Even in the new edition, some people just can’t get over using INT as their dump stat.

Dr. Psycho, I like to refer to things whose wrongness is exactly duplicated on every imaginable level as “fractally wrong.”

karpad and Sarah Anderson made me hoot with laughter out loud at work. Thanks a lot.

So the idea here is that “gay” men want to have sex with men because they want to be women, but “homosexual” men just want to have sex with men because they’re such huge fans of Manliness? Wait, this is an actual thing? I thought Nabokov just made this shit up, man!

Also, do I have to prove I’m straight if I go apply for a straight marriage license? ‘Cause that’s gonna pose a problem.

Oh, isn’t that special. People (like most of the commenters in that PW thread) who believe they’re being logical, when they’re actually being big crybabies, are so much fun.

I especially like the two fellows who keep thumping the establishment clause from the 1st admendment, even though they don’t know what it actually says. The relevant clause prohibits Congress from establishing an official state religion… it does not prohibit any branch of the government from regulating religious groups.

Karpad thank you - that’s one of the best comments I’ve ever read. And, my co-workers think I’m a little silly now for chortling uncontrollably at my desk.

Reading the fatally stupid (I wish) remarks from that post I would like to think that, well, they would be fatally stupid. Gah.

Even in the new edition, some people just can’t get over using INT as their dump stat.

I thought it was CH… oh, wait, that too.

...Well, someone rolled really, really badly.

Next time they should use point buy. You end up not having to play another half-orc barbarian who has to roll Not Craziness to avoid spouting off about the Marxist-feminist-homosexualist axis that’s trying to give marginalised members of society more rights because they hate them so much. And really, The Barking Insanities just doesn’t stack up featwise next to Cleave.

(...I’m sorry, I was born a 3.5Er and I’ll die a 3.5Er. If, in the former case, you mean “2nd Er.”)