How fucking complicated does every theory about Barack Obama have to be?
The newest one is that he’s hiding documents in a library about all the time he and Bill Ayers spent plotting to blow up churches and daycares by combining the powers of the Annenberg Foundation, Richard Daley and Mrs. O’Leary’s cow to hide the magic plans and blueprints from prying eyes. Or, more likely, the files are tied up in some bureaucratic technicality (like the shredder!) and will be released as soon as it’s fixed.
This goes along with Barack Obama’s mysterious three-country birth certificate, his ever-changing name and religion, his wholesale manipulation of the entire Democratic primary process, his wife’s hidden radical thesis manifesto, the rather large body of George Soros pet projects he’s the point man for, his ability to singlehandedly preserve infanticide in Illinois, his manipulation of global politics and that whole Crisis on Infinite Kenyas thing. One time, I asked Barack Obama to go pick up a Coke for me at the store. He came back three months later with five preserved and framed shares from the original Coca Cola Company and a Brazillian flag. I didn’t ask, but they all make very nice wall decorations.
WELL, LOOK AT THIS UPDATE: The White House lost more than half a year’s e-mails. Just, you know, randomly.
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Are you getting paid for this, Jesse? The reason anyone cares about Obama’s connections with Bill Ayers is that Ayers is an unrepentant terrorist who, as recently as 9/11, said he “didn’t do enough.” That lunatic blew up American buildings and killed our own people. If he’s a friend of Obama’s—and Barack Obama has tried to duck the allegation that he’s more than wave-from-the-garage friendly with Ayers—then people have a right to know about it, just like you guys slobbering over the number of houses John McCain owns.
Look, you are unapologetic in your fealty to Obama, but most people look at him and wonder why the hell he deserves to be president other than his blackness? This is a carefully orchestrated campaign that wants everyone to know only what they care for voters to know about Barack Obama. So, if there really isn’t anything more than hopeNchange, then looking at his associations shouldn’t be a big deal.